Assamese Pre- wedding Rituals

An Assamese wedding is simple and yet very elegant. It is known as Biya because during the wedding the traditional 'biya naam' song is sung by the ladies. The wedding consists of Vedic tradition and rituals. An Assamese wedding also consists of pre wedding rituals. Here is a brief description of the most common pre wedding rituals.

Nau puruxor sarddho

In this ritual homage to the ancestors of both the bride and the groom is paid by their respective parents. This is done so that progress of wedding is hassle free and to get the blessing of the ancestors.

Daiyan Diya

This ritual is performed in the early morning of the wedding day. Curd is sent to the bride's house from the groom's place. The bride is supposed to eat the half part and the other part is returned to the groom. The groom eats the other half. The curd is a symbol of good luck.

Juran Diya

This is the most important pre wedding ritual. In this ritual the groom's mother along with some close relatives visits the bride place where she receives a very warm welcome from the bride's mother. The bride's mother greets her with with xhorai, a brass plate covered with a gamocha. The groom's mother gifts her wedding attire along with an odd number of clothes.

Tel Diya

This is the second most important pre wedding ritual. The groom's mother places a ring and betel on her daughter-in-laws hair parting. In addition to that she pours the oil she has brought with herself thrice. Next she applies vermillion on the bride's hair partition.

Pani Tola & Nuani

This ritual is performed on the wedding day at both the bride's and the groom's venue. Holy water is collected from a river or lake in a pot. After this both are made to bath with the holy water. After the pani tola both are prepared for the wedding ceremony.  

Arrival Of The Groom

This ritual is conducted for fun and can be observed on the wedding day. The groom is not given entry in the bride's house until he pays a price.

Arunachal Pradesh Pre-Wedding Rituals

In Arunachal Pradesh marriage plays a very important role in the society. A marriage is considered unrecognized if it takes place outside the prescribed rituals and rules of the community. Normally three types of marriage are practiced.
a)     Marriage by negotiation or service (Aaw long aaw)
b)  Marriage by elopement (Thok no ho chai)
c)  Marriage by kidnapping or capture (Aan sheio Aaw)

Ritual followed in Marriage by negotiation/ Practice

Negotiation

When the groom’s parents find a girl of their choice they hire a middleman(Chow-Pachaw) for marriage negotiation. The middleman finds his assistant who would help in the negotiation process. On an auspicious date they do to the bride’s home along with hopha (kind of token-some amount of sugar) and Baan Moya (a platter of flowers). They are kept before the bride’s parent.  The middleman conveys the message of the groom’s party. The bride’s family keep the decision secret till the second visit. If the bride’s parent are not ready for the alliance they have to return the hopha.

In the second visit the middleman along with his assistant visits the bride’s house. This time the decision of the parents are known. If the decision is a positive one a third hopha is placed in front of the bride’s parent and the date of engagement and marriage are fixed. The bride price is also negotiated. This is done to secure the future of the bride. Horoscopes are also matched. If something unfavourable come the marriage negotiation is cancelled.

Pong Pha-Engagement

The groom parent present the bride’s parent with a token (Pha) which contains 1. Pa heing(smoked fish) A fish lays a infinite number of eggs. The people think that the couple will be able to reproduce and in this way the family members would increase.  B) Khaw tom (cooked sticky rice which is neatly tied by leaves) The people believe that by giving sticky rice the love between the bride and groom will be evergreen and they would be together for the lifetime (sticky). C) Wan Khai (bowls filled by 5 or 7 eggs) This custom is performed to inform the celestial bodies like the sun, the moon and the stars about the marriage. It is prepared very carefully.

It is a custom that the groom’s party should have the same number of male members as there is in the bride’s party so that they can form a couple. In addition to that Pha( Smoke fish, sticky rice and egg bows) should be carried by unmarried girls. If a mistake is detected the groom’s side pay a fine of Rs. 140. The elders tie a scared thread around the wrists of both the groom and the bride.

When the engagement is complete the negotiator hands over another hopha (token amount) and a platter of flowers before the bride’s parent. He takes the permission to take the girl with him.

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Tripuri Wedding Culture

Tripura is a state in North East India. The Tripuri Tribes originated from Tripura and Bangladesh. Tripuri tribes belong to the famous Tibeto-Burmese tribal group. A tripuri wedding is very different from a regular wedding. The rituals followed by these people are also very distinct. Here is a bit of information about tripuri wedding culture.

Hamjwk Tubui Kaimani

A marriage broker plays a vital role in a tripuri matrimony. He is known as Raibai or Andra. The decision of marriage is the whole and sole of the parents. If the parents disagree the process ends here. The bride or the groom has no choice. They have to agree with the decision of the parents. This type of marriage always take place in the house of the bridegroom. If the girl is chosen by the groom parents the bride parents demand a sum of money and ornaments. It is a custom in tripura that the girls does not bring dowry to his husbands home. This custom makes tripura free from dowry system.

Koksurma

This is the preliminary proposal for marriage from one of the parties. If the proposal is accepted by both parties then they fix a date for a final settlement called Kokswhngmung. Raibai play a vital role in theses type of marriage. He fixes the brokerage in the koksurma.

Kokswhngmung

This is the process in which marriage is finalised. Both the parties commit to get their ward marriage. The guardian of both sides sit side by side in front of two pots of rice beer called bwtwk. A bell-metal plate containing some cotton, durba, copper coin, rice, soil etc. is put in front of them to perform the rituals of Dangdua, performed by each person three times. The would-be bride then comes before the assembled persons and bows before the elders. The dates and times, terms and conditions of the marriage, bearing of expenditure etc. are finalized in this kokswhnglaimung. It is a custom that the bride has to wash the hands of all the old people present on the occasion. In addition to that she has to bathe her would be parents.

Khum Phunukmung

Once the marriage is finalized the every family member of the village is called by invitation. The invitation is given orally by offering betel leaf, nut and flower etc. This ritual is started from the village head that is also known as Chokdori. Once the date is fixed for the matrimony the bride is brought to the groom house. She is welcomed with enthusiasm, and dangdua.

Ayajuk Invitation

A day before the marriage the bridegroom party invited Aya and two boys for carrying water by offering a betel.

Nagaland Wedding Traditions

Marriage in Nagaland is centred around many interesting beliefs, facts and principles that are rooted deep within the tribal people of the state. Marriage takes place in the Church. The date of marriage is fixed during the engagement. During courtship the boy and the girl and their respective parents has to live a clean and prayerful life.

There are two forms of marriage—one ceremonial, the other non-ceremonial. The ceremonial involves many rituals and many guests are there to witness the events. The non-ceremonial is a simple one. It involves taking the bride to the grooms house where she stays for a single day.

Naga weddings don't last for many hours. After the lunch buffet people tend to leave. Organising a Naga wedding is a huge operation taking months and months of planning.

There are some interesting rituals followed in a wedding. The couple decides to marry without the consent of the parents. They get married in the middle of the night. This remains a secret. In the morning when they see their daughter carrying the load of fire to the other house they come to know that their son or daughter has tied the nuptial knot. The groom's friends play a vital role in this type of marriage. With the help of his friends the groom brings the bride to his house.

Another rituals states that the young boy expresses his desire for marriage. He also informs his choice. The father of the boy sends a friend to the girl’s house to know the willingness of her parents. If the bride's parents agree for the matrimony the bridegroom's father puts the matter further to the test by strangling a fowl and watching the way in which it crosses its legs when dying. If the legs are placed in an inauspicious attitude, the match is immediately broken off. Otherwise the girl is informed of the favourable progress of negotiations. At this stage, she can exercise a power of veto, as if she dreams an inauspicious dream within the next three days, her suitor must search a bride elsewhere; if all goes favourably the wedding day is fixed.

This is a very interesting ritual. After the boy and the girl were engaged, they went on a trading expedition for twenty days. If the expedition was profitable, the marriage preparations were proceeded with, but if there was a loss (it was considered as inauspicious omen) the engagement was broken off.

Adivasi Pre-Wedding Rituals

Adivasi marriage system is very different from a general Indian marriage. There are some practices like winning of the bride by capture, purchase, service to the parent, elopement- negotiation which fascinates people. They want to know more about this type of marriage. Payment in various forms is made for bride price. Adult marriage is the usual practice. A marriage means a lot to Adivasi. Marriage is seen as a roadmap of prosperity and start of new life. Marriages in Adivasi are pure and sacred. All the customs are followed.

They are few people who play a vital role in matrimony. Raibaar is the middleman who mediates in initiating talk about marriage proposal to either family. He is known by both the families.  Majhi  is the headman of village.

Sar Sagun: Talk initiated by Raibaar to both the families.

Raibaar visits both the families and talks to both the families. If the bride side show interest in the alliance then they would inform the Raibaar to initiate the talk with the boy's family.

Orah duar njel: Visiting of parents and relatives to each other’s home

Once both the families agree for the alliance, they visit each other. During the visit they would examine the condition of living, status and other things but also check how the family members are and presenting themselves in front of other family members. For a fair judgement they take the relatives along them. Once they return home they discuss their observation and decide whether to go on with the proposal or not.

Horah chinah: Final decisions and conveyed by Raibaar.

Both the families convey their final decision to Raibaar. If it is negative, the process will end. If the decision is positive the parents will convey their decision to Majhi. He is the headman of village. The to be bride and groom are presented new clothes. This process is called Horah chinah.

Taka chal: Express decision to Manjhi and arrangement of marriage.

Both the families convey their decision to Majhi. The majhi would give a green signal for the marriage preparations. Taka Chal is the custom included with the process.  In this process groom’s family has to hand over meagre money to bride’s family.

Newta: Invitation to relatives and final preparation of marriage

Family members will be busy inviting their relatives, friends, near and dear once. But first invitation is always to the Majhi.

Parsi Pre-Wedding Ritual

India is one of the most religiously diverse nations in the world, with some of the most deeply religious societies and cultures. Religion still plays a central and definitive role in the life of many of its people. This stands true for marriages in India. The majority of Indians have their marriages planned by their parents. A parsi marriage is also planned by the parents and it is conducted with great eagerness and intensity.

Pre-Wedding Ritual

Rupia Peravanu ceremony

This is the unofficial engagement between both the families. Ladies from groom's family visit the bride's house and gift her silver coins and shagun. This ceremony is repeated at the groom's house as the bride's family visits them.

Groom Adravanu or Nam Padvun

Each party goes to other's party's home and present them presents of silver coins. This denotess that thay are ready for alliance. After the engagment is done the the bride takes the name of her husband, even if the marriage does not later occur. This engagment is often performed quickly after a marriage is arranged.

Mandav Saro

It is performed four days prior to the marriage ceremony by both the parties. Thursdays and Sunday are considered best for this custom. A flowerpot with a mango plant, planted in it is kept in the house.

Divo

Two lamps are lit, one in each of the homes of the marrying parties. Once again the ladies travel to the home of the other party and place a silver coin upon the lamp. It is at this occasion that formal gifts are exchanged. This includes the exchange of wedding rings.

Adarni

It is performed three days before the marriage. It is a ritual of gift exchanging. On this day the groom's family visits the bride's home to present her with all the gifts like clothes and jewellery. The bride can also visit the groom's place but the vice versa is not allowed. Later, all the guests are served a traditional meal of sev and dahi, boiled eggs and bananas.

Varadh Patra

It is a religious ceremony performed to honour the dead ancestors.

Supra nu Murat

This ritual is similar to the haldi ceremony organized in Hindus. The groom and the bride are applied turmeric paste by five married women.

Nahan 

The couple takes purifying bath after which they get ready for the wedding ceremony.